#72 The Voice From Beyond the Wall

At some point in my life I erected a wall within myself. Maybe it was so that I would not have to listen to "her" babbling, crying or screaming. Whatever the reason, it has lead, I think, to the situation that I find myself in now.
It is true that I have often heard the voice from beyond the wall say things that surprised and frightened me. I immediately tossed them back over the wall and buried my bewilderment.
The very serious internal injuries that I have perpetrated against my body appalled me, even more than it did other people. Although I admitted that, at the time, I was the only one home (I was sure of that), I could honestly tell someone that only a truly crazy person could do such things...and I am not crazy! I just never understood where the capacity for that much pain came from (and I still don't).
Then I went and did it again.
The little one beyond the wall is still saying incomprehensible stuff but I will not deny her reality anymore. Together we are tearing down the damn wall.