#32 I Am Not Just My BPD

Today I want to say that I am not just my Borderline Personality Disorder. I want to write that I am also an intelligent, mature, creative human being.

I want to but I can’t. Maybe I just picked the wrong day.

Because today I am feeling overwhelmed and confused.
I am frustrated but I don’t know what about.
I am anxious for no specific reason.
I am sad but I can’t figure out why.
I am mad but I am not sure who at.
I am ashamed for feeling like a 5 year old.

And it feels like it has been like this forever.
I have never been intelligent, mature, creative or fun to be around.
Maybe, I have had, and will have, good days, again but, having BPD is like falling into a dark hole.
I cannot see backwards and I cannot see forward. There is only the hole and I am drowning in oversized, inappropriate, very scary feelings.