#43 Jamais Vu

Two or three years ago, I started having episodes of what I now know is called jamais vu. (The opposite of déjà vu, it means "never seen".)

It occurs in my own neighbourhood, the places that I visit regularly. Unexpectedly, I look up and the intersection or the street or the buildings look like nothing I have ever seen before.
At first, it is new and interesting. I’m curious about this place.
But then, I realize that I don’t know which way to go. I’m lost and I’m very scared.

Then, suddenly, I’m back and I’m really shaken!

For what was probably a very short period, I had no idea where I was. It turns out I’m only a few blocks from my house, but nothing was familiar. I could have been in another country or on another planet.

Where was I really?

Maybe it is some form of dissociation but not the kind I have always known. In the past, I have floated for hours, at peace, finding my way home by some sort of radar. Even though I was unaware of my surroundings, I was not the least bit frightened.

This new thing terrifies me every time it happens.